A/N: This was specifically noted for a friend who has been losing hope of ever finding the “love of her lifetime”.
Hope this helps. 🙂

Falling in love is not easy.

You take the risk of getting hurt.
No one wants to get hurt.
I either applaud in amazement or shake my head in bemusement to the people who keeps on trying their hand in love.
I, myself, have been in love before. Thrice in fact.
Though you don’t get use to the pain when it comes crashing down, you still can’t help but wish that somehow, someway, someone’s gotta be out there made just for you.

I believe in true love.
But I find it hard to believe that everyone will find their true love in this life.
God has His plan but I’m not sure everyone already has their love story written in the book of life.

Despite this, there’s no harm in believing.
As long as you don’t let it control your life.
Just keep on living life to the fullest.
As they say, we only have one life and it’s too short at that.
So why waste time pining when you can simply accept wholeheartedly and live?

Love is everywhere.
You may not find it in your life in terms of a partner but you definitely have it in your family and friends.
As my mom would always remind me, God never made someone to live alone in this world.
You will always have someone there for you.
And if all else fails….

God wouldn’t. 😉

☆ wellspringcore ☆

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Scene from a WIP…


Been a long time since I last posted something. My bad.

Anyway, I’ve been thinking of writing again. Hopefully, it will be something good enough. I might be too rusty to be able to conjure up something worthwhile. (grin)

Well, the one I’m posting below is a scene from the one that I’m currently writing.

Just some warnings:
– this is a slash story (meaning m/m pairing)
– it’ll be quite explicit should I post the entire story here
– constructive reviews are welcome but flames are considered as trash

Well, on with it!

“You are still awake.”

Yuhi jumped in surprise at the statement. He turned to look where the words came from and saw the object of his thoughts. “Shin…”

Shin said nothing and moved from where he was leaning on the doorframe. Casually, he pulled the door close behind him and started to walk towards the young prince.

Yuhi started to feel a tendril of anxiety as the sound of the door closing reached his ears. The way Shin is making his way towards him even looks predatory. “I could not sleep,” he offered to the earlier statement.

Shin said nothing. He walked towards him until there was half a feet distance between them. “Were you thinking of what I told you earlier?” he asked quietly.

Yuhi tensed but after a moment, nodded. He then let out a gasp when suddenly he was pulled to the duke’s arms. “Shin!”

Shin leaned down until his face was buried in his neck. He inhaled the familiar scent of cinnamon, cool waters and something that’s purely Yuhi.

“Are you scared of me?” Yuhi heard him whisper. The soft puffs of air made him shiver.

“N-No. Why would I be?”

Shin pulled back until he could look at the face he had in mind for years. He kept his arms around him as he confirmed the sincerity behind the words. Guileless sapphire eyes stared back at him with pure innocence shining from their depths. “Then…will you accept my offer?”

Yuhi stared back at the pair of silver eyes that seemed to reflect the rays of the moon on a dark night sky. “Can…I ask why?”

Shin frowned, “Why, what?”

“Why me? I am plain. I am clumsy. I am weak. I am so shy I would rather spend time with my books than with people. I am a prince, yes, but it is my brother who will inherit the throne. I do not-”

A finger placed on his lips stopped his words. Warm silver eyes never strayed from his even as he slowly worked himself up with his inadequacies. “You are so blind, my tenshi. It is both endearing and damn troublesome.”

He frowned up at the duke upon hearing that. “I am not endearing. I am a guy, damn it.”

Shin chuckled at the pout on the other’s lips. “You think you have nothing to be proud of when it is so far from the truth. You are not clumsy, you are just not used to doing new things. You are shy, yes, but I know that you spending more time with your books is a matter of you preferring to know more of different things rather than being a snob and ignoring the people. Yes, you will not inherit the throne but you are the strength and light of this kingdom. And you are not plain. You are the most beautiful person I have ever seen.”

“Please…I am not beautiful. No lady or lord would even sought my affections.”

Shin growled upon hearing such from his intended but he reined in the anger it brought. “Is that why you wonder why you were chosen? Yuhi, your dear brother made it clear by making an official decree that no woman would be allowed to curry your attention unless you initiated it yourself. Ryuu knows well how opportunistic the nobles and their daughters are. He wants to ensure that no one will be able to trap you into something that you don’t want. As for your submissive nature…” Another growl left him, “That gave Ryuu a lot of trouble. While women are trouble, dominants are dangerous. Hence why as much as possible, your contact with them are limited to your brother, me and the council.”

He buried his face again on his neck and murmured, “You don’t know how many times the king had to fire and exile those nobles that keep on trying to take advantage of you. He even had to stop me from killing some of them.”

Yuhi’s eyes widened at the confession. “So even then…?”

“Yes,” he growled and his arms tightened. “I have wanted you for years, Yuhi. I agreed with Ryuu when he asked me to wait until you reached this age to tell you about us as I want you to enjoy your youth. But you are MINE. I can not, and will not wait any longer to claim you.”

Yuhi closed his eyes and slowly, his arms reached up to wrap them around the young lord’s body. “I have always thought that Nii-sama will betroth me to someone who can protect me and have some affection with at least. But he gave me far more when he betrothed me to you.”

Shin pulled back only until his face was inches apart from the young prince’s. He stared, waiting for the confirmation he sought.

A brilliant smile that could rival the sun appeared on the beautiful visage, “Yes, of course. How can I say no to you, my lord?”

A small smile creeped up on his lips in return. Before he can stop himself, he gently took the petal soft lips below him. When a gasp of surprise was emitted, he took the opening and slipped his tongue on the warm orifice he had craved for long. A deep growl escape him as the taste of his betrothed filled his tongue.

Yuhi’s head is spinning. The touch of Shin’s lips sparked something inside his body and when the wet, hot appendage snaked inside his mouth, he started feeling faint and a heat was crawling in his veins.

Well? How was it? Ah, to those who know me personally I’d appreciate the review directly on my personal email. You guys know who you are. (wink wink)

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When is too much?

This was a question that came into my mind after finding out about an old acquaintance’s break up with his long-time girlfriend.

When is it too much? I have a simple belief for this, actually.

Say, when you’re with someone and he (I’m using the general pronoun here) inadvertently hurts you, that can be forgiven. You talk it over between the two of you and end up with a better understanding on what happened and what to do to avoid it. But for that person to hurt you again for the same reason, then that means something is wrong. Being hurt for the same reason is not just too much but I also see that as stupidity.

For me, if someone truly loves you, he will make sure that he does not hurt you for things that he could have already avoided. If it does happen again, it must be due to outside interference, unavoidable circumstances or any other factors that are outside of your control.

That’s my simple take on it.

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YuYu Hakusho

Someone asked me before “What’s your favorite anime?”
I don’t particularly have a favorite but I do have some that I treasure among the others. One of my personal top favorites would be YuYu Hakusho or commonly known as Ghost Fighter.

Wikipedia’s information of it goes like this:

YuYu Hakusho (幽☆遊☆白書 Yū Yū Hakusho?, lit. “Ghost Files” or “Poltergeist Report”) is a Japanese manga series written and illustrated byYoshihiro Togashi. The name of the series is spelled YuYu Hakusho in the Viz Media manga and Yu Yu Hakusho in other English distributions of the franchise. The series tells the story of Yusuke Urameshi, a teenage delinquent who is struck and killed by a car while attempting to save a child’s life. After a number of tests presented to him by Koenma, the son of the ruler of the afterlife Underworld, Yusuke is revived and appointed the title of “Underworld Detective”, with which he must investigate various cases involving demons and apparitions in the human world. The manga becomes more focused on martial arts battles and tournaments as it progresses. Togashi began creating YuYu Hakusho around November 1990, basing the series on his interests in the occult and horror films and an influence of Buddhist mythology.


Here’s a better synopsis (for me) from

Urameshi Yusuke, 14 years of age, is about as troublesome and violent as teenagers come. He is constantly ditching school, causing trouble, and getting into numerous fights everyday. One day however, he does the unexpected, sacrificing himself to save a young child. Such an action, was never ever expected, especially coming from someone as troublesome as Urameshi Yusuke. The afterlife is not prepared for Yusuke, as they never thought he would make such a sacrifice. Nowhere to go, and dead, Yusuke becomes a ghost and must earn his way back into existence.Yusuke is “employed” by Koenma, who is in charge while his father and ruler of the afterlife, King Enma, is away. Under Koenma’s command, Yusuke helps to stop menacing demons that threaten the lives of people everywhere; whether by stealing priceless and invaluable items and destructive weapons, or by wreaking havoc on humans everywhere.Throughout Yusuke’s journey, he is usually joined by; his arch-rival, and local bully, Kuwabara Kazuma. He is also joined by two demons named Hiei and Kurama, whom are ex-convicts of the afterlife that managed to escape from Koenma.This group of unlikely allies goes on to participate and struggle in battles that have outcomes that determine the fate of humanity!Yu Yu Hakusho is created by popular mangaka Yoshihiro Togashi, who is also responsible for creating the acclaimed and much-loved series known as Hunter X Hunter. Yu Yu Hakusho also managed to surpass Dragon Ball Z in ratings during its TV run.


So that’s a rough draft of the plot line of the anime.

I first saw the series when I was in fourth grade of grade school. I latched on to it immediately as I have a fondness for anime even back then (though not much of an obsession yet). I can say that it sparked my interest and my obsession. I really loved the story and the characters’ personality. My personal favorite was Kurama, followed by Hiei. Not much of Yusuke and Kuwabara though I know they are important (obviously since the main character is Yusuke). I loved it so much I created a fanfic (I didn’t know it’s fanfic, only that I’m imagining a different setup for the story) of it in my mind for several years.

The flavor of family, friendship, sacrifice and the supernatural appealed to my entire being that I can honestly say that I can feel every emotion in me whenever I watched it. Let’s take a look on the main characters:

Yusuke Urameshi may be a goofball at first but he embodies every hero of the series. Stalwart, loyal, powerful and reliable. He learns from his mistake and he never lets himself stray to the wrong path. He always do what he thinks is best for everyone. He died at the onset of the series when he saved a little kid from being hit by a car. Koenma then struck a deal with him that would help him return to life by giving him a golden egg he needs to take care of (which he chucked into the fire to save Keiko) and later on by having someone kiss his body to save him. We saw his transition from a normal high school student to a powerful mazoku.

Hiei is the typical antagonist turned ally. He’s cold, antisocial, snob, and mean. He rarely cares for the people around him. But that was until we were shown how much he loves his little sister and to what lengths he went through just to find her and to keep her safe. He is a forbidden child of a Koorime and was born with a twin sister. He was unfortunately cast away from their island (it was an all-women island) against his mother’s wishes and because he was a fire demon. When he grew up, he had a Jagan implanted on his forehead to help him find his sister. In exchange, he can never tell her who he really is. He and Yukina have matching pearl necklaces from their mother’s tears (Koorime’s tears turns to rare pearls when shed) that he wore secretly. We saw his transition to a loner to a very important and loyal part of team Urameshi.

Kurama is the guy who portrays the perfect gentleman. He’s polite, courteous, intelligent and good-looking. But later on, it’s shown that he’s actually an old, sly demon thief fox (or a kitsune in Japanese folklore though he’s a guy and kitsunes are normally women) that is well-known in Makai for being ruthless and cunning and escaped into the Ningenkai when he was shot while escaping from a heist and sought sanctuary by fusing his soul to a baby in a woman’s womb. He was originally a partner in crime of Hiei but he turned on him when Yusuke helped him save his ningen mother. His human name is Shuuichi Minamino. We saw his transition from a sly, mistrusting soul to a warm, caring and protective friend they can rely on.

Kazuma Kuwabara is Yusuke’s self-proclaimed rival. He is your typical high school bully who was undefeated until Yusuke came in the picture. He vowed to defeat Yusuke but sadly, the latter is just too cunning and powerful for him. He is unusually sensitive for a human which allows him to “sense” the spirits around him. He is hopelessly smitten with Yukina and constantly gets into fights with Yusuke and Hiei, cracking jokes about Yukina’s older brother never knowing that said brother is his team mate (he is the only one in the group who deosn’t know this). We saw his transition from a clumsy, bit dim-witted bully to a courageous, and unshakably loyal guy of the group.

Other characters are:

  • Keiko Yukimura – Yusuke’s childhood friend and future sweetheart who helped him return to life when he first died. She’s a normal high school girl with looks and brain. People wonder how she became friends with Yusuke, not knowing they are childhood friends. She has an unusually strong slap and is able to keep Yusuke in line when others can’t.
  • Koenma – Enma’s son who helped Yusuke return to life by giving him chances and later assigned him as the Detective of the Spirit World. He’s the one who gives Yusuke his assignments. He is portrayed as a toddler with a pacifier but he can take an older form as shown during the Dark Tournament. His pacifier is like a storage where he stores his power that can create a shield or seal powerful demons.
  • Genkai – an old reiki master who taught Yusuke how to properly use his powers. Yusuke respects her even if he acts as she’s a cold-hearted old woman with no mercy. She also trained Kuwabara and helped him harness his spiritual energy. She used to be the younger Toguro’s teammate and lover 50 years ago. She died in the Dark Tournament before the final face off between Team Urameshi and the Toguro Team. When Team Urameshi won the tournament, Yusuke wished for her to return to life.
  • Botan – is a fairy girl of the underworld or what we call a grim reaper. She was the one who guided Yusuke’s soul when he first died. She’s usually clumsy and a crybaby but she is very loyal. She has a certain fear of Hiei especially when he’s so powerful and mean. She accompanies them on their assignments and provides information and gadgets they might need.
  • Yukina – is a Koorime and Hiei’s twin younger sister. She grew up in the island for Koorime and was usually watched by Hiei in the shadows. She left the island after learning about her twin brother and set to find him. She was kidnapped by an evil businessman who wanted to get her pearl tears and sell them off but was later saved by Yusuke, a love-struck Kuwabara and her missing brother Hiei. She has healing powers she uses to help them. She’s painfully shy and innocent causing endless frustration to Kuwabara much to Hiei’s worry.
  • Shizuru Kuwabara – Kuwabara’s older sister who like him is unusually sensitive. She can not only sense spirits but also see them. She’s the one who takes care of Kuwabara as they live together. In the anime, she had a brief romantic connection with Sakyo but I heard this did not happen in the manga.
  • George (Jorge) Saotome – is an ogre who is portrayed to be Koenma’s main assistant (more like slave) in the anime. Koenma always blame him when things go awry even when it’s Koenma’s fault. He tries to do the right things but gets overpowered (more likely bullied) by his boss.
  • Pu – or Pusuke is Yusuke’s spirit beast. It looks like a cross breed of a penguin and a dog breed with floppy ears. It was hatched from the golden egg Yusuke was given on the start of the story to help him return to life. The creature to hatch from it is suppose to resemble the purity of a person’s actions. Yusuke was ashamed at first to have a spirit beast like Pu (who definitely looks like a stuff toy) but was endeared to him when he helped him during Genkai’s trial in the Dark Tournament. When Yusuke returned to life after getting killed by Sensui, Pu transformed into a huge blue phoenix.

I guess that’s the most important ones. YuYu Hakusho is a must watch for all anime lovers. It’s definitely a classic (as it’s also a bit old) and will give you a great experience.

Yu Yu Hakusho

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Ramen! I love ramen. Period.

I may not be Japanese but both Japanese and Chinese cuisine have special places in my palate, though I mostly favor the Japanese cuisine. My aunt lives in Japan and I have a cousin (her daughter) who’s half-Japanese. Her stepfather loves to cook for us and brings a lot of Japanese food whenever they come home here in the country. When we were younger, out of several nieces and nephews they have, only me fell in love with the food. My cousins (including the half-Jap) prefers the chocolates they bring. Sure, I love chocolates but I still loved the food. Ramen, soba, sushi, rice balls…I ate them all. My uncle even laughed and jokingly asked me “Are you our daughter?”.

Until now, I still have a voracious appetite when eating Japanese food. Back in college, I ate a whole tray of California Maki all by myself. When we had a seminar in a five-star hotel that offers different cuisines, I was stuck in the Japan station and gulping down ramen and sashimi. I have a regular package of soba from my aunt. Basically, I am a glutton for them.

Last week, I dragged my mother off to a ramen house I’ve been eyeing in the mall. GREAT DECISION. The ramen house is a first-class one. Their ingredients are authentic and you can definitely taste it in their food. I really loved the experience. Only downside is that the prices are a bit higher than the common ramen-ya. Still, if you really want the best, you’d understand their price range. 🙂

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Okay, first off: definition by Wikipedia:

Yaoi, also known as Boys’ Love, is a Japanese popular term for female-oriented fictional media that focus on homoerotic or homoromantic maleandrophilicsexual relationships, usually created by female authors. An article in the Guide describes it as having begun as homegrown fan fiction between male cartoon characters. As these depict males, there is an androphilic male audience as well; however, manga aimed at a gay male audience(bara) is considered a separate genre. The main characters in yaoi usually conform to the formula of the seme (top or attacker) who pursues the uke(bottom or receiver). The material that would be classified into this genre primarily involves gay relationships between the handsome or cute (male) characters, usually erotic.

So in short: boys’ love or, if you wanna be crass about it, gay love. I have nothing against the homos. I have two uncles who are homo and so is one of my cousins. I also have friends that are homos. My reason for posting this is to simply announce my obsession with yaoi. Manga and fiction stories are my passion. Aside from normal anime, yaoi is my other obsession. But since my family are Christians, it’s like a dirty little secret of mine. We tolerate it but we can’t like it, so to speak. So I keep it under wraps and do it “under the radar”. Anyway, it started when I wanted something new to read. I haven’t read any new books and fanfics that I’m almost out of my mind (I have this quirk where I need to read something at least one story/information a day or else I feel so unsettled I won’t be satisfied). So a friend of mine from grade school who shares my obsession of anime and writing suggested yaoi to me. At first I was apprehensive about it. I mean, come on, what normal person wants to see two guys doing it? I know I’m a perv but not like that! – was what I thought but after watching Ikoku Irokoi Romantan and the s*x scenes (insert nosebleed here) and reading Junjou Romantica, I was hooked! There’s something inherently hot watching (and reading) two anime guys doing IT. I’ve been hooked for four years now (and still counting) and yet my obsession doesn’t seem to waiver. I’ve actually lost some interest with hetero pairings and I mostly focus on yaoi. And not just in anime and manga. I’ve expanded to non-fiction writings, book characters, anime that are NOT yaoi, even porn!  Just to give you an idea, I’ve read most of the yaoi fics in under the following:

  • Naruto (SasuNaru, KakaIru, ItaSasu, ItaNaru, KakaNaru, ItaDei, GaaNej, GaaNaru, ShikaKiba, ShinoKiba, ShikaNej, KyuuIta, KyuuMina)
  • Bleach (GrimmIchi, ShiroIchi, ByaRen, IchiUryuu, ByaIchi)
  • Reborn (1827, 6927, 8059, RL, R27, D18)
  • Vampire Knight (KaZe)
  • Harry Potter (DraRry, SnaRry, LucHar, VolHar)
  • Full Metal Alchemist (Elricest, RoyEd)
  • Gundam Wing / AC (HeeroDuo)
  • Saiyuki (GokSan, GojHak)
  • Kuroshitsuji (SebasCiel)

and other fics from livejournal, adultfanfiction, and fictionpress. I think I’ve also read about 65-70% of yaoi manga listed in animea back in 2009-2010 (though I rarely visit that site anymore and focusing in mangafox). If the manga has no chapters in animea or mangafox, i hunt it down in mangatraders and download it. By the way, favorite mangaka are:

  • Fujisaki Kou
  • Shungiku Nakamura
  • Minami Haruka
  • Yamakami Riyu
  • CJ Michalski
  • Chitose Piyoko
  • Minase Masara

So if anyone has updates on their ongoing works, feel free to notify me. Sometimes I get too immersed with work I can’t check on all of their works to see if there are updates. So yeah, I guess that would be enough venting and blabbing about my obsession with yaoi. I’ll probably be posting related topics sooner or later (as I’m currently unemployed while waiting for my start date on my new work) so you guys just have to bear with it (insert evil laugh).

DraRrySasuNaruGrimmIchiSebastian x Ciel

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Calls and cheescake

So after venting out regarding my soon-to-be past employment, I am very happy to say that the new company I’ll be working with has finally contacted me to inform me that I am already scheduled for a contract signing!
I was so happy that my foul mood vanished for the rest of the day yesterday! God must really love me (even though I, myself know how bad I really am)! It’s really an answered prayer for me.
Anyway, one more thing I was so happy about was that my dear beloved mother had answered my call for appeasement of my craving blueberry cheesecake! She was on the mall yesterday with my aunts and she bought me a slice (which wasn’t enough because of my gluttony)!
She told me she didn’t wanna buy it at first but she took pity on me and my continuous posts of my craving in facebook.
I’m one heck of a lucky and blessed piece of sh*t! 🙂


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